Run Out The Clock in Reston

U.S. News & World Report named Reston as one of its 10 best places to retire, vaulting it into the ranks of such great metropoli as Eden Prairie, Minnesota, Punta Gorda, Florida, and Bella Vista, Arkansas. So if you don't like arctic winters, 3:30pm early bird dinner buffets, or the Deep South, Reston's pretty much your only shot at running out the clock in peace.

By way of proof, U.S. News produced a video of old elderly people doing martial arts, plus Robert E. Simon sitting next to his statue, talking about how his town is, in the words of the magazine, "designed to encourage human interaction and whimsy." Sweet! We like whimsy. But then they have to harsh our buzz by including this poignant quote, a painful reminder to us all of our fleeting mortality and the ultimate, unavoidable loss of everyone we hold dear.

"I don't have any family to speak of, but I've accumulated a lot of friends here. It's important for old people to see old familiar faces," says Robert Webb, 76, a retired newspaper editor.

Ouch. But hey -- happy Friday, and please to enjoy this video of elderly people beating on each other.