Flashbacks:
The RNGC Caddyshackpocalypse
Bollards!
If this photo seems a bit "off," as though its builders didn't use quite the correct DRB-approved shade of Hunter Green or Helvetica Neue font, there's a reason. Our dedicated Restonian archeological team has unearthed proof of yet another Reston -- one not to be confused with our already well-documented doppelgangers in England, Scotland, Ireland, Maryland, and Canada, or even our former sister city in Kenya. No, this Reston is in the heart of the Florida panhandle, somewhere north of Tallahassee in the region that's brought pandering country music back to the radio. Here's how the good folk of Reston, Florida, describe their community:
Reston is a safe, peaceful community in Gadsden County, Florida. We live by Havana, known for its antique shops, restaurants and friendly atmosphere.Havana? That seems to fit more with our Reston's political leanings than what we'd expect from a panhandle community, but that's just us. Are there any similarities between us and our southern cousin, Google Maps machine?
Clear-cut for utilities? Check.
But the most important similarity, the one that allows Reston, Florida, to truly wear the mantle of its northern namesake?
Silly rabbit, of course they have an HOA, the end.
Forget the flying saucers or the pod people, I think the alien invasion more subtle than that. I think they're real plan is to cover the Earth in "Restons" to slowly take us over with earth-toned color restrictions and ridiculous HOA fees.
ReplyDeleteGet your tinfoil hats on!
Hey, Scotty. Does the tinfoil hat really protect a person from the evil Smudgin death rays?
ReplyDeleteWinter's comin' so I'm movin' down there ;)
ReplyDeleteBet there are gators in that lake...
ReplyDeleteAs places in the panhandle go, Havana isn't terrible. But if you do venture down that way and someone invites you for a Tennessee Waltz, know that it is not a dance.
ReplyDelete