We Watch Public Television So You Don't Have To: 'If You Lived Here' Visits Reston, Refuses to Walk Its Bucolic Paths

It should surprise no one that Reston is boring sophisticated enough to be featured on PBS, and our plastic fantastic planned community's moment in the spotlight came on Valentine's Day, of all days. WETA's program If You Lived Here visited Reston, and in case you were drizzling melted chocolate on various baked items (or something else) last night instead of staring slack-jawed at the teevee, you can watch it on your computer machine here.

Like Reston itself, the program was pleasant, inoffensive, and just a little bit awkward. But in a good way! Aside from the hosts, we get to see a familiar cast of Reston characters who serve as the Virgil to the hosts' Dante-like exploration through the multiple rings of Reston real estate.

So, the whole point of this here teevee show is to guess the price of three properties on the market; kind of an upmarket, PBS take on all the slightly more exciting real estate shows on those crass commercial networks. The first two homes -- a townhouse and a single-family home in Less Fashionable South Reston -- both appear to have been tastefully renovated and updated. No sunken conversation pits, no original russet brown appliances, and lots of recessed lighting and newly painted walls in various hues of greige. What's the fun in that?

Surrounded by greige. So much greige.

It's not all sunshine and greiges, though. Multiple times, the dynamic duo joke about how they refuse to walk on all of Reston's fancy paths, etc., and if they wanted to guess the prices of some.... unique properties, they should have walked upstairs while filming all that B-roll at Lake Anne. Factoring in a lack of hot water is definitely a pricing challenge for the most savvy expert!

But all that's forgiven when they visit a penthouse condo at Reston Town Center -- which no one told them is technically not part of Reston, but that's okay! That's where we learn that $2.7 million gets you some pretty amazing views, four parking spaces (presumably app-free)... and this room:

The rich are different than you and me. They apparently love Pepto Bismol.

Also, there's talk about how close this one-percenter aerie is to all of RTC's restaurants. Prospective buyers might want to work up an appetite pretty quickly, the end.